Lithographers Crayon, Ink, Thread and Fabric on Sewing Pattern Paper 65″ x 54″
In between this piece and another, I was agitated while having to consider the “Male Gaze” in my work. As a figure artist who works with female nudes based on self-portraits I was perplexed once again by having to consider the work to be sexualized when that was not the intention. So I cut the breasts off one piece, and sewed them up onto the figures chest, so as to keep them my own, essentially wrapping them in on themselves and holding them close to my body. I decide to expand on that idea with this piece. As this process leads to a gaping hole in the chest of the body, I felt the need to fill it with something else. The filmy fabric that now pours through the chest gave a beautiful feeling of exhaling, as if it was a breath caught and stuck for years, finally released. This piece speaks of memory as well, and how thinking back to younger years in a mature body changes the memory. By taking out the gatekeeper of sexuality it allows emotion to spill out, and reveals a more innocent memory. I drew the face, and decided it was wrong. Cut out a new piece of pattern paper, redrew the face. Because of the transparency of the pattern paper, the other face was still visible. I cut the fabric and then used ink to make one more layer of face. It creates a visual feeling of unclear vision, fuzziness and a need for focusing on the act of looking. The fabric with the ink produces a feeling of depth which contrasts with the flatness of the drawing which I find enjoyable, as it works to suggest viewing a memory in my mind.